I am the cognac-swilling head of my own video personality cult.
Seven rainbows appeared when I was born. I shot eleven holes-in-one in a row.
My videos are given 5 stars over 99.9% of the time. Even my chosen video favorites are studied around the world.
I am the shining star of youtube, and I work 22 hours a day, never tiring, only thinking of my viewers.