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Rebecca Wild
Posted 5 months ago

Last December I was called to surrender.


It felt so easy at the start. I was pushed into it and gawww the peace that followed after years and years of obsessively trying to control my life was blissful. Apart from that little blip with Skye recently and health and finance bits in-between, I've never lived life so stress-free. Ever.

I started to think, 'okay universe, this is a bit easy isn't it? Aren't I here to learn through hardship and brutal challenges?'. But there was silence... And life stayed calm. No traumas. No deaths. No loss. It was a life I wasn't used to. I started to get a little restless, unsure how to function without chaos (please reference 'You'll find the chaos if that's what you believe in' lesson in my book).

The restlessness fought with the peacefulness. Confused. A little alarmed. Questioning whether I was on the right track. Whether I was doing enough to enhance my learning here on earth school. Was I even living my dharma if it wasn't painful? Did my life even mean anything if it was so easy?

And then it turned into panic. What is the point in me being here if I'm not uncomfortable?! How can I possibly grow in all this calm? What is this hear to teach me, this whole surrender era? I'm so...

UNCOMFORTABLE. This era is making me so uncomfortable. The exact recipe for learning.
Observing.
Growing.

It's been a lesson in disguise all along. An AHA moment as I watched another Cotswold sunset yet again and felt the pang of guilt at how lucky I was to be able to do that. How privileged I was to be in love, to be able to walk again, to be able to drive to this spot.

THIS is the learning. This is the discomfort. Permission to be okay with things being okay. Allowing myself to feel like I deserve it, without having to 'earn' it. Surrendering to the peace.

and...It's okay to BE okay.

LYL.

#surrender #learning #soullessons #soulled #trustmyself See less

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