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254,803 Views • Sep 9, 2024 • Click to toggle off description
matthiasjbarker.com/from-conflict-to-connection/co…
Views : 254,803
Genre: Education
Uploaded At Sep 9, 2024 ^^
warning: returnyoutubedislikes may not be accurate, this is just an estiment ehe :3
Rating : 4.975 (190/30,288 LTDR)
99.38% of the users lieked the video!!
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User score: 99.07- Masterpiece Video
RYD date created : 2024-11-22T15:35:41.389873Z
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957 Comments
Top Comments of this video!! :3
Sucks when that person is your mom.
1.6K |
"They don't have a problem with how they treat you. You do." - That hurt, in real life.
305 |
The way this looped was genius. The answer is there is no answer. You cant reason with a narcissist because its like he said "they dont have a problem with the way they treat you, you do." Why would they change when theyre not the one thats uncomfortable?
313 |
"Blames you for why they mistreat you, uses your vulnerabilities against you."
What a brick of reality to the face..
Brutally liberating.
57 |
You don't instead you RUN AWAY. Narcissists won't change or even attempt to listen to someone else's perspective.
473 |
God he used all of the above. I new he was a narcissist. I'm so glad i left him finally. This video explained it so well.
4 |
25 years of this exact thing you said. I am so glad that is over. Thank you
4 |
EYE OPENER. HANDLING CONFLICT WITH A NARCISSIST, ONLY TWO WILLING PARTICIPANTS.. BUT THERE IS ONLY ONE: YOU!.. WHO CARES,, JUST YOU LOVE ♥️
4 |
They give you silent treatment until you apologise, spot on.
105 |
This helps a lot! Wish I knew this many years ago. At the time I had no idea what & who I was dealing with but I gave up on discussions as they lead nowhere, gave up on sharing time, energy, intimacy as it always fired back & later on eventually left.
However I have felt enormous guilt ever since as it appeared that I broke the family & only now I understand that with such a toxic person nothing can flourish.
5 |
Thanks for the reminder to not take him back. That was a close one.
8 |
this is one of the saddest and most awful form of human suffering I can think of. For them, and everyone around them. Thank you for your work, perspective and education. Awareness is the beginning.
5 |
He enjoyed every second of hurting me. I’ve decided to move on and let him deal with the evil that lies within him.
3 |
The best way to handle conflict with a narcissist is to reject their invitation all together. There is no reasoning, meaningful conversation, self reflection (on their part) only disappointment, frustration, invalidation for you!!! Remember, the first time you’re a victim, every time after that, you’re a volunteer. Peace!!!
33 |
Can’t be done, so just leave them and start living your best life without them!
4 |
So wise....just stay away from those kind of people.
6 |
Man that last sentence real hit it home.
“They don’t have a problem with the terrible way they treat you. “
For real! They don’t care that they are horrible people!
297 |
It took me waaaaaaay too long to learn this lesson. I needed to see this video years ago.
282 |
With my ex I spent hours and hours explaining to him how his behaviour effected me. Because I knew if he could only understand, he would change, because he cared about me. Or so I thought.
It got to the point where I started screaming because I didn't feel heard, seen and understood. Which was exacerbated by trauma on those exact same points inflicted by my parents, which he knew. When I first screamed at him, his response was 'I don't deal with screaming people'. Which was valid. So when I did some introspective thinking I came to the conclusion that I hadn't felt heard, seen and understood and I asked him for help.
If you're familiar with narcissists you can guess what's comming. Instead of trying to make me feel more heard, seen and understood by listening and actively participating in the conversations, he drove me to that same point, over and over. He understood exactly what it did to me. So he started actively ignoring me when I got to that point. Which drove me insane.
I've learned to be even more introspective, so that when I feel the need to even raise my voice, when I feel that trauma creeping up, I can cut it off. My now partner and I had one conversation this year where I started feeling like that. And I told him, that if things wouldn't change, I'd go. He fully understood and together we worked towards healthy communication and I haven't felt like that since.
It took my ex leaving me before I got the necessary insight though. Into his character and what he did to me as well as my own troubles.
38 |
@WaterBug46
2 months ago
They don’t have a problem with the way they treat you. You do. 100% 🔥
1.4K |