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1,804 Views • Nov 29, 2024 • Click to toggle off description
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73 Comments
Top Comments of this video!! :3
I got diagnosed in 2020 and I suddenly forgot how to mask. Great being my authentic self, not so great day-to-day. 😅
21 |
It's so diffrent since I started to know what it was... Thanks for your input Becca❤ I felt like I was lying or had to in order for people liked me more or tolerated me but I didn't like me sooo much I was always depressed and exhausted. And I agree we should take over and neurotypicals should live with the fact that a stupid question might be answered with a nasty look or the blunt truth no matter how uncomfortable it makes others feel: let's share the akward 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
6 |
I think it's actually pretty impressive that we are able to observe a social situation and then morph into a piece that fits that particular vibe. I also hate it, and it's super stressful and it sucks. 😂😂😂 I wish I didn't mask, but I don't know how not to do
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“What if we just took it over” is a daily consideration
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I’m with you! Time for a take over! 😅
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You have a point, Adam. Masking gets talked about quite disparagingly in the community, and I understand why. But my low self esteem actually has a lot to do with the fact that, for a lot of reasons, I never really learned to mask well. It’s less exhausting on one level, but my persistent screw ups have left me feeling like such a failure. For most of my life I couldn’t figure out what the problem was.
So I admit that, when I hear talk of being my authentic self, my usual reaction is that I’d rather feel like someone that people might actually like. Basically I’m learning to mask in my sixties, but I’m still crap at it. I imagine it’s not healthy, but I’m tired of driving people away.
8 |
Becca, I totally get it. I was good at making until my husband died and then snap. I had too many events in a short time that required heavy emotional lifting and I couldn’t keep up the masking. That’s when I finally got my dx.
But seriously, I don’t get the whole “rude” thing. Like I was a team lead at my old job and someone on my team had nut allergies. I kept asking upper mgmt to make an announcement about not putting food on the sign-in table. (There was a table 2’ away for food and shared items plus the kitchenette 10’ away). One night one of my reports was crying bc she could not sign out bc someone had, again, left peanut butter cup wrappers all over the sign in table. (She had already been written up several times for not signing in/out in the book bc it was not safe even though she had repeatedly reported the issue bc “you have an epi pen, right?”).
So I cleaned the table, redid the signage, etc. Next morning there was a Reese’s peanut butter cup pie on the sign in table (signage smeared with peanut butter). I will admit I was not the nicest in my response.
I picked up the pie. “ATTENTION: as has been announced multiple times before and is clearly posted, food goes on the food table (I set the pie on the food table) and not the sign in table! Several of our coworkers have severe allergies. Let’s try not to unalive them today.”
Well I got called in and written up bc (1) the announcement should have come from upper mgmt — even though they had refused to do so for months and (2) the person who baked the pie had felt I disrespected her pie and she had been crying uncontrollably all afternoon and how were people supposed to know about the pie if it wasn’t on the sign-in table? 🤯
I have to take this is neurotypical behavior because the majority of the people in the office thought that the right thing to do was to leave the pie where it was and that saying something was rude. That the people with allergies shouldn’t make a big deal when someone is trying to do something nice for the office like bake food. I cannot get my head around it
16 |
❤ I agree becca😂 1:25
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That's a good idea, Becca. Let's do it.
2 |
Masking and hiding your feelings all the time can be detrimental to your health,I developed an autoimmune disease (Crohn’s) and have suffered many years from it,after major surgery I discovered being the odd one out was better than being ill constantly to appease a world we were meant to change and not fit into. ✨💕
5 |
I was good at masking before my burnout. But masking doesn't reduce cognitive cost, (if I understand what this means correctly...) it makes you completly exhausted, but you find masking so important and necessary that you do it at all cost
Lack of energy and being pushed to the limit (I imagine that's a big reason why ND parents lose "masking skills" too) makes it impossible to mask well, and the problems get so scarily obvious. Problems you didn't know you had, cause you've been masking since before you can remember and think "this is just my normal".
The problem is that when masking skills are lost and the mask is droped, it's really really hard to put the mask back on, even just a little. I find there's no good balance, or a way to mask in a healthy way. Because of the cost of energy I will always use "too much" energy for any given task or situation, and I'll end up with a handicap compared to others. So I'll either not get what I want or need out of the situation (socially, economically or whatever it is) or I'll be so exhausted by trying that I still don't get through what I want or need.
So these days I just give up, cause THAT'S something I've actually gotten really good at, with lots and lots of practice and experience! 🤣 /j
(edited for mistyping errors
12 |
Oh man I would love it if the roles where switched for a week and all the neurotypical have to mask
2 |
An applause for the both of you: 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏
6 |
Once again…. NAILED IT. Yeppers 👍🏼 eff that mask BS, who got time for that? Take it over, I’m with ya Becca!
4 |
“Follow us we don’t know where we’re going” best subscribe pitch I’ve ever heard
1 |
I've always thought of masking as self-censorship in some ways because it feels like you can't be your authentic self.
2 |
Yes but if we were in charge nothing would get done... Time limits mean nothing when your the one running the place😅
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Why is Becca so cute oh gosh I love her so much 🥰🥰
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Question: Are these shorts spontaneous things based on something that happened shortly before or that day? Are these planned?
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@consuelonavarrohidalgo5334
1 month ago
0:58 "Don't ask the question!" Well said, Becca.
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