@crystalding5589

1 year ago

Thank you. Heidi Priebe talked about the dynamic maturation model of attachment in a video about how unresolved trauma can be seen as incomplete learning, whereby the resolution of trauma consists of integrating both the emotional pain of the event and its effects, as well as the logic of "why it happened", so that the brain can learn a complete lesson from the trauma and ensure it knows how to protect itself from similar events in the future. Until this point of integration and accurate contextualization, according to her video, we can spend a lot of our time overreacting to triggers that "seem" like the old wound even when they are not, in a state of heightened arousal to try to make the past painful event "unhappen". Ive realized that so much of my worry is about associating current triggers with the past in an effort to try to make something in the past "unhappen". That's where your comment really resonates - at some point the worry becomes pain without gain, a secondary pain to the primary pain of the thing that happened. I've realized the road to healing consists of accepting, over time, that what happened, did happen, in all its dimensions, and that acceptance leads to letting go. So thanks for helping me find words to articulate this.

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