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174,554 Views ā¢ Oct 16, 2024 ā¢ Click to toggle off description
Views : 174,554
Genre: Education
Uploaded At Oct 16, 2024 ^^
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RYD date created : 2024-11-25T13:10:39.277553Z
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227 Comments
Top Comments of this video!! :3
"Logically feelings don't change the situation"
That quote hit home for me, because that's exactly how I think too often. And I do feel like I'm disconnected from myself, everything I do sort of feels... hollow somehow.
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I recently had a very deep conversation with an older lady who was diagnosed with cancer last year. She said that sometimes people avoid experiencing emotions and call it 'resilience', but in order to be resilient, you first need to acknowledge and accept your emotions. She is a very wise person. I think every day about her words.
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Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I canāt stop thinking about her, Iāve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, Iām frustrated, I donāt see my life with anyone else. Iāve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I canāt, I donāt know why Iām saying this here, I really miss her and just canāt stop thinking about her.
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I used to smother my feelings because I thought that being sad when someone hurts me would be "letting them win". But I know now that that's wrong. I'm hurt because I had trusted someone with my heart, and that's brave of me; and that's beautiful of me. Nothing to be ashamed of. The shame should lir with the person who deliberately treats you carelessly. I know that now. That would be something that I would want to tell little me.
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You're correct that grief never sleeps. You can grieve something that happened a very long time ago.
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I was sure I didn't have feelings, but I've been working on noticing them for 5 years, and it turns out I do! Patience is key.
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It actually comes out physically, when you avoid negative feelings. Iāve grown stress cysts on my scalp so now I canāt shave my head anymore. Others get it worse, stroke, heart attack, weād rather not discover how many more there are. Letās just cry when we feel like crying and purge the toxic people until they learn weāre all people.
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This is really true š„° Iām dealing with a lot of anger now because I have only starting opening up and being vulnerable in the last 2 years vs 28 years of suppression and building up a wall. Gosh itās hard work now but worth it! šŖš¼ Keep those lovely people around who understa
21 |
I have seen this over and over in people that I have cared about.
People who came from terrible childhoods and just pretend it never happened and instead they self-sabotage and they make everyone around them miserable.
Finally I had to learn that I cannot help them if they won't help themselves.
80 |
Strangely enough, you can CHANGE your feelings by naming them. "I'm feeling angry that she left me" becomes "I'm feeling sad and I miss her" becomes "I'm feeling motivated to get over this" becomes "I'm feeling determined to understand how I contributed to the situation and how I can change to avoid these mistakes in the future." Name it to tame it.
23 |
Recently Iāve started to name the feelings out loud to myself. Itās helpingā¤
32 |
Thank you for this video. My feelings are all over the place. Suppressing them happens when I don't feel safe expressing them to people who aren't comfortable with that kind of intensity.ā¤
4 |
This hit home. I DO feel my feelings. I feel them fully. Growing up though, I was told to suppress them. Neglected by my parents, one an alcoholic and one an emotionally detached and traumatized person, and I was often told that no one wants to hear about my feelings. I guess they had their own feelings so they didnāt have time for mine. So I wrote poetry. Really good poetry, too. And became somewhat of a comedian. Cause people love to laugh, right? They can handle āhappy emotionsā. And animals ā¦ i got lost in saving animals. In caring for them. They donāt get uncomfortable when youāre sad. Theyāre consistent with their love. So I just became this poetry writing, cat hugging, bird saving, pot smoking goofball. I still feel my feelings fully, I just keep them to myself for the most part. Itās rough when you feel real human emotions but youāre surrounded by people who arenāt into that. Whatās awesome though, is I have kids of my own now, and Iām raising them to be whole and complete people. Emotions are okay. Talking is good. Trust is vital. Thatās the one good thing about being damaged by your family. You know the mistakes that can be made, and you can make sure you donāt make them. You can make sure that your kids donāt go through the same. You can make sure they love themselves as much as you love them. Iām hyper aware of the words and actions that cause harm to children. That cause harm to anyone, really.
104 |
After losing a relationship of 3.5 years.. I looked for whatever advice I could get. My father likes to describe himself as a logical and straightforward man. While I appreciated his advice on how to cope with this loss.. I ended up not even recognizing it as a loss. It took me forever that people would never understand the deepness and complexity of my past relationship like I, someone who was in it, would. Grief does indeed wait for you.. and I think a lot of the time we donāt like those negative emotions because we learn not to from others. Parents or role models āstay strongā for their kids, loved ones, etc. it may be a noble thing to do but Iād wager in the long run.. real strength comes from expressing and dealing with those emotions properly, through sublimation, and teaching THAT to children. The body keeps score.. and Iām starting to think the bloodline does too
41 |
I've only started allowing myself to "feel my feelings" in the last 5 or so years (early 30s)...and it sucks because I feel like I never learned to deal with them properly and so I don't know how to express them correctly. I cry when I'm angry, laugh when I'm nervous, short/testy when I'm sad...but it's better than nothing I think š¤·āā
36 |
My therapist told me, when you numb or avoid the pain, you numb the rest of your emotions. And things dont feel the same or nothing feels okay. Feel your feelings when they happen. Emotions are valid, understandable, and temporary. This too shall pass
1 |
I shared my feelings for most of my life. I had my late husband, whom I could turn to, and he was there for me. Always validating my feelings. He was the one who suppressed his feelings, always bottling them up. Eventually, the stress cause him to have an emotional breakdown and died from a broken heart š. I reached out to people looking for support. All I got was people shutting me down and telling me to get over it. I have gone silent and isolated. It has changed me. I have mental health issues now
2 |
I think itās incredible that people can actively choose to avoid feeling their feelings. I almost think its a superpower. As a big feeler, I wish I could adopt just an ounce of that and feel more ānormalā
6 |
In therapy ive learned if you really let yourself explore the icky feelings and go through it, you can get past it more freely. I held so much until i released it by truly acknowledging it
34 |
@DocSpice
1 month ago
When my brother passed suddenly age 32 I took over, organising the funeral, contacting his friends, and selecting the music so my parents wouldn't have to do it. One day, months later, I came home and accidentally closed the door on a stick insect. As it lay dying in my hands, I started to sob uncontrollably. My Mum heard and rushed to the front. She tenderly put the insect to sleep and hugged me. I cried for over an hour straight. Grief waits for you.
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